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Funnier Quotes

I hope you find value in these encouraging quotes about Funnier.

You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)

Related topics: Funny Movie

Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde

Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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Thank You,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous

You have enemies? Good.
That means you've stood up for something,
sometime in your life.
- Winston Churchill

 

Minds are like parachutes.
They only function when they are open.
- James Dewar

When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
- Milton Berle

I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
- Phyllis Diller

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields

We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks-
if we agree with him.
- Mark Twain

A person with a new idea is
a crank until the idea succeeds.
- Mark Twain

Here are the opinions on which my facts are based.
- Anonymous

When we remember we are all mad,
the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
- Mark Twain

Always listen to the experts.
They'll tell you what can't be done and why.
Then do it.
- Robert Heinlein

Why not go out on a limb?
Isn't that where the fruit is?
- Mark Twain

Laugh Loud - Laugh Often
Laugh At What's Funny - Laugh At What's Sad
Laugh At Me - Laugh At You - Laugh At Life
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I'm just preparing my impromptu remarks.
- Winston Churchill

As to marriage or celibacy, let a man
take which course he will,
he will be sure to repent.
- Socrates

All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

All you need is love.
But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
- Charles M. Schulz

When life gets you down -
just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
- Anonymous humor

Normal is in the eye of the beholder.
- Whoopi Goldberg

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

Okay, here's your first lesson: how to take a FALL!
- the movie Karate Kid

My life has been filled with terrible misfortune;
most of which never happened.
- Michel Eyquem De Montaigne

I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono

The road to success is always under construction.
- Anonymous

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

I love deadlines.
I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
- Douglas Adams

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain

You got to be careful if you
don't know where you're going,
because you might not get there.
- Yogi Berra

There's a fine line between genius and insanity.
I have erased this line.
- Oscar Levant

You can always do one thing less than you think you can.
- Anonymous

I refuse to answer that question
on the grounds that I don't know the answer
- Douglas Adams

Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
- Steve Martin

When you think you're out of time,
smile, and turn back the clock.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

An old friend will help you move.
A good friend will help you move a dead body.
- Jim Hayes

What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
- the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)

I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
- Charles M. Schulz

It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
- W. C. Fields

I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel

Sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
- Groucho Marx

I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain

Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West

Nothing is so common-place as to wish to be remarkable.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

What we've got here is failure to communicate.
- the movie Cool Hand Luke

Always remember the three magic words: You're right dear.
- Anonymous

Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald

The future ain't what it used to be.
- Yogi Berra

When you reach the end of your rope,
tie a knot and hang on.
- Anonymous Saying
(Sometimes attributed to Franklin D. Roosevelt,
Eleanor Roosevelt, or Thomas Jefferson)

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston Churchill

I can't stand a naked light bulb.
- the movie A Streetcar Named Desire

Today is my day to laugh at life.
Laugh loud - laugh often.
Laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad.
Laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When everything comes your way
you're in the wrong lane.
- Anonymous


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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