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I hope you find value in these encouraging quotes about Funniest.
My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw
Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde
I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
- Phyllis Diller
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Thank You,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You have enemies? Good.
That means you've stood up for something,
sometime in your life.
- Winston Churchill
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
Minds are like parachutes.
They only function when they are open.
- James Dewar
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
- Milton Berle
When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw
Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous
A person with a new idea is
a crank until the idea succeeds.
- Mark Twain
Always listen to the experts.
They'll tell you what can't be done and why.
Then do it.
- Robert Heinlein
Why not go out on a limb?
Isn't that where the fruit is?
- Mark Twain
Here are the opinions on which my facts are based.
- Anonymous
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
Laugh Loud - Laugh Often
Laugh At What's Funny - Laugh At What's Sad
Laugh At Me - Laugh At You - Laugh At Life
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When we remember we are all mad,
the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
- Mark Twain
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields
We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks-
if we agree with him.
- Mark Twain
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
- W. C. Fields
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde
I'm just preparing my impromptu remarks.
- Winston Churchill
When you think you're out of time,
smile, and turn back the clock.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
- Groucho Marx
There's a fine line between genius and insanity.
I have erased this line.
- Oscar Levant
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
- the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
- Charles M. Schulz
I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
As to marriage or celibacy, let a man
take which course he will,
he will be sure to repent.
- Socrates
I love deadlines.
I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
- Douglas Adams
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
My life has been filled with terrible misfortune;
most of which never happened.
- Michel Eyquem De Montaigne
Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins
When life gets you down -
just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
- Anonymous humor
I refuse to answer that question
on the grounds that I don't know the answer
- Douglas Adams
Normal is in the eye of the beholder.
- Whoopi Goldberg
Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West
Nothing is so common-place as to wish to be remarkable.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
You can always do one thing less than you think you can.
- Anonymous
The road to success is always under construction.
- Anonymous
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono
All you need is love.
But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
- Charles M. Schulz
Okay, here's your first lesson: how to take a FALL!
- the movie Karate Kid
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
- Steve Martin
You got to be careful if you
don't know where you're going,
because you might not get there.
- Yogi Berra
An old friend will help you move.
A good friend will help you move a dead body.
- Jim Hayes
You're already a bastard.
Might as well be an enlightened one.
- the movie Simon Birch
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
- H. L. Mencken
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!
- the movie Shrek 2 (2004)
Are we there yet? are we there yet? are we there yet?
- said by Donkey in the movie Shrek 2
I'm awash in self-contempt!
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
I've developed a new philosophy...
I only dread one day at a time.
- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
Tip the world over on its side and
everything loose will land in Los Angeles.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West
The future ain't what it used to be.
- Yogi Berra
You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
Confucius might have said:
Once frightened, twice smelly in armpit.
- Anonymous humor
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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